You couldn’t take your eyes off Cristiano Ronaldo sideshow – it was comedy gold

Cristiano Ronaldo was determined to be the goalscoring hero for Portugal against Slovenia, but he ended up in tears and then relieved for the display of his goalkeeper

In hindsight the warning sign was there.

It was only around 20 or so minutes into the game when Cristiano Ronaldo – having already failed to match the movement of the speedy Rafael Leao, or stretch high enough to get on the end of Bernardo Silva’s superb cross – decided to try and take the easiest way home.

As a cross came into the box Ronaldo flopped to the floor under a meagre challenge, glancing upwards and throwing his hands out to appeal to referee Daniele Orsato for a penalty. It was never, ever going to be one.

And with that we saw what this was. It was the tortured act of a fading hero, and the rage against the dying of the light. Ronaldo had yet to score at this Euros, but he doesn’t go four games without a goal, does he? When has that ever happened before? Superheroes don’t take two weeks off. And he’s playing against Slovenia?

And here’s the thing. Portugal, in this company anyway, are a good enough team to indulge their captain in this mission. Silva and Bruno Fernandes will use their endless energy levels to knit it all together, Leao – finally at this tournament – was looking so menacing down the left, Joao Cancelo was superb at right-back and Joao Palhinha and Vitinha were an excellent midfield combination. But then upfront there was an old man yelling at a cloud.

Is that harsh? Probably. No-one likes it when age restricts you from doing the things you did before, but then Ronaldo wasn’t always blasting in free-kicks from near the touchline at the peak of his powers either.

That ridiculous effort close to half-time summed up what the first half had been, and there was element of pantomime about the way it ballooned into the waiting Portuguese fans. All it needed was a sad trombone sound effect.

Ronaldo reacted as he did for every miss in the first half, near or far, by throwing his hands up to the skies and wearing the pained look of a man who has just found out he’s sitting next to Nigel Farage on a long haul flight.

This was his torture, and we were all living it with him, even if what we actually wanted to do was watch a football match between a side capable of winning the European Championships and another playing in their first ever major tournament knockout match.

Ronaldo will be 40 in February ( 
Image:
Anadolu via Getty Images)
Such a desire had completely gone out of the window by the time of Ronaldo’s third free-kick, which he belted directly at Jan Oblak so ferociously that the goalkeeper didn’t really need to do anything other than just exist to make the save.

He tired after that, and that should have allowed the rest of Portugal’s players to play around him a little bit more, except they suddenly realised that all of this running about had made them quite tired as well.

It took the introduction of Diogo Jota to liven things up again, even though he was hopeless at first as he didn’t seem to know which of two spaces – his own or the one Ronaldo should have run into – that he needed to occupy.

Diogo Jota presented Ronaldo with two great chances ( 
Image:
Getty Images)
But then a minute from time Jota superbly won the ball back and played the type of pass he’ll have seen Ronaldo receive thousands of times over the years. This one was met with a comfortable Oblak save.

And then the crowning moment. Jota again, simply running directly at the goal no matter who was in his way in that style he does. Vanja Drkusic was clumsy, penalty.

Perfect. This will be the smiling Ronaldo front and centre of your Instagram algorithm, staring back at you as you try, but fail, to scroll past. But no.

Oblak saved, and the captain of Portugal is crying in the middle of the pitch halfway through extra-time against a side ranked 57th in the world. Oh no, has something terrible happened? Nope. He’s just not scored. The big screen flashed to his mother Delores in the crowd, also in tears. Again, just because he’d not scored.

Ronaldo was comforted by Roberto Martinez even though Portugal won